Thursday, September 20, 2012

I Don't Want Sister

I am very glad to report that after a few month of hard work together, Ace has finally learnt enough words and hanyu pinyin to write a full sentence!

Sadly, the first sentence that he wrote was this! For those who cannot read chinese, it says, "I don't want a sister.."

I am not pregnant if that is what you are wondering but we are open to a second kid and so far, Ace has always been bugging me to give him a sibling to play with. When he was younger, he was quite open to having both brothers and sisters. But sometime around the age of 4, he started insisting that he only wanted a younger brother but not a sister. His reasoning was that he wanted to play boy games and girls cannot play boy games.

If i explained to him that girls can play boy games too, he will say he already has a god sister and that is considered a sister...

I explained to Ace that I really have no choice over when I will get pregnant again and also whether it will be a girl or a boy. "The only person who can choose is baby.. baby will choose whether it wants to be girl or boy.. just like you chose to be a boy...  just like Ah Yee did not choose for didi in her tummy to be a boy or a girl.. didi decided he wanted to be a boy, so he is a boy lor..."

That night before we slept, I asked him again, "So, Ace, since we cannot choose.. if mummy get pregnant again, and it happens to be a girl, would you still love her?"

"Yeah," he said.

"Then can you promise me not to say or write something like that again?" I asked him. I explained to him that babies too can hear, see and feel things that the mummy does and so they have awareness. Since he will want to love his sister anyway, it means that whatever he has written is not really true.

"How would you feel if you are the baby in the tummy and you hear and read or feel that people outside.. like your closest family say they don't want you.. "

"I will feel very sad..."Ace said..

"Yes, indeed.. so if mei mei hear you say this or sees this note.. even though you do not really mean it, she may misunderstand and feel very sad. Do you want her to feel sad?"

"No," said Ace and he promised me that he wouldn't say that anymore.

A few days later, he came up to me and asked me, "Mummy, can you ask god/gohonzon hor, when he give you baby, can the baby be born 4 years old? I really want someone to play with and I cannot wait for baby to slowly grow into 4 years old..."

I told him if the baby is born 4 years old, he or she will be too big to fit into my tummy!

PS: Today, we were talking about our neighbour's little sister and he was saying that she doesnt like to share and is always up to mischief. I told him that this is a stage that children go through. When his god sister and his cousin grows to that age, they might be disagreeable and mischievous too. "So what are you going to do as a big brother?" I asked him.

 "I will hug them tight and tell them that what they are doing is not right.. don't do this anymore because I don't want you to become a bad person.. "

Wahahahaha...

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