Tuesday, March 09, 2010

That Little Girl At The Escalator

After many days 'apart', we finally had somet time to spend together and Max suggested that we watch a movie together. I suggested Little Soldier, Small General as my friends told me that the movie was quite good.

Sure enough, the movie was a pleasant experience.. after 8 days of pov and learning about inspiration and awakening, I really enjoyed the interesting story about how to surrender to our life.. no matter what happens, Jackie Chan's character goes, "挺好的" (which means 'that's pretty good' when loosely translated to english.. To me, the story was same as the story about inshallah and about how to be the happiest banglasdeshi people in the world... It was a story about all the lessons I had learnt in the past 8 days!

When were there, something interesting happened. While we were going down the escalator, there was a mother who had already gone a few steps down an escalator with a pram and she was scolding her daughter, "If you don't come down by yourself, then I don't want you!"

And the little girl just stood in front of the escalator.. frozen in fear... so frightened that she couldn't even cry.

Out of the goodness of his heart, Max picks the little girl up in his hands and told her, "Don't be afraid, uncle will carry you up onto the escalator. Don't worry..." But she was on the verge of tears.. and then I went to hold her hand.. something I knew my son liked me to do whenever he is frightened on the road... "Don't worry, you are safe. I will hold your hand and take care of you..." I told her..

And so she stopped crying. But as my heart was rather open, I really felt jets of fear hitting her as her hand touched mine. So in my heart, I went "bishhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" (which means I sent love to her)...

And I guess for her, the trip downwards on the escalator may have seemed like eternity. But she did seem to calm down a little after that. When we finally reached the ground floor, her mother smiled at us and said, "Thank you so much..." but turned her head and frowned at her little girl and started scolding her again, "I don't want you anymore..."

In his last ditch attempt to help the girl because we understand how much heartbreak was being created, Max told the girl before we left, "No, it's not true.. mummy will never not want you..." but the mother just pulled the girl away and continued scolding her.

As strangers, there is just this much I can do. I hope though that the little girl will one day understand the mother responded this way because she was overwhelmed with two young kids and was exesperated. Perhaps she did know how to go down the escalator by herself and refused to do so.. that is why her mother was angry.. cos she too, was fearful that she would not be able to cope if her daugther did not do wat she wished her to do.. guess she did not count on asking for help and tat two kind souls who are also parents like her would understand and want to help:)

Well, it was a great reminder for me to forgive myself for the times that I could not contain my anger and forgot my mantra "挺好的" and lashed out at Ace.

So Ace, I'm sorry, please forgive me, I thank you and I love you... *hugs*

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